counting backwards by threes

1 May, 2009

people who live in glass houses shouldn’t cast stonesI put on a movie to drown out the silence of loneliness, a comedy. Something starring an old SNL cast member. The past few hours are still ringing in my ears, loud sentences growing with each echo, each reverberation another frantic thread plucked and smoothed, again and again and
a shaky breath and I prepare for sleep with out his weight, his smell or any smell really, besides my own awkwardly familiar scent on the pillow.
I take the laptop to the bedroom, plug it in and turn off the lights. The humor onscreen is not nearly as consuming as the memory of Jeff* laughing at me earlier. I press buttons and turn up the volume as loud as it will go. I keep hearing Jeff’s laugh though. I roll over and move my legs so I fill up the whole bed, counting backwards by threes from 100 until the laughing stops. It’s probably just PMS.

*name changed to protect the… not so innocent.


One Response to “counting backwards by threes”

  1. Blunt Says:

    Honey, I’m so sorry someone hurt you. I’m thinking of you, and I’m here if you need to rant.

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